i encounter the knight automatonic

I DISCOVER THE CONDITION OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC

1 - Washed ashore, covered in barnacles; seaweed-entangled limbs and sand-clogged guts (clean out inner workings)

2 - Shattered, limbs blown off in some ancient catastrophe (reassemble)

3 - Inert in coffin, chest open. Bright arcing heart in crucible (replace in chest)

4 - Bound tight in an empty vault, hung from a dangling chain (free bonds)

5 - Frozen in clear sea-ice, swimming midstroke (thaw and dry)

6 - Strapped to table, attached to lightning rod apparatus (flip switch)

7 - Buried in sand, its fine filigree circuits scoured (retrace circuit connections)

8 - Embedded in a tree, branches and undergrowth grown around its limbs (cut away plants)

I INSPECT THE CHASSIS OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC

1 - Fist sized bronze cubes, rippling like a pixelated figure. Can stack up to 20ft as climbable blocks

2 - Marble statue of a buff princeling. A valuable, attractive piece of art when motionless

3 - Etched coils of silver curls flow over each other like snakes. Can fit through small holes

4 - Brass armor like stylized flames. Immune to cold; speeds up in heat, faster until it melts

5 - Boxy green-enameled armor. Helmet plume from extinct bird. Plant & animals never attack it

6 - Head like security camera, cloaked and hooded. Bonus to stealth

7 - Golden likeness of a many-armed god. Roll twice on WEAPONRY

8 - Oxidized iron body, top heavy like Superman. Can fire six chest missiles each long rest

I ADMIRE THE WEAPONRY OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC

1 - Estoc (exploding d8)

2 - Hex wrench tetsubo (d20, loses a turn on miss)

3 - Radium broadsword (d8, glows and save vs poison radiation on hit)

4 - Rack of wakazashis in its back (2d6, always has another if disarmed or thrown away)

5 - Morningstar steam-fists (d8, rolling sends them flying)

6 - Spinning saw blade (d6, save or lose a limb)

7 - Oversized grabbing claw (bonus to grapple, crush d6)

8 - Drillbit lance (d8, odds ruin armor)

I INQUIRE THE IDENTITY OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC

1 - Rex Talionis. An iron crown on its head. It claims to have memories of a king

2 - IG-77. A bandolier across its chest. A mercenary

3 - Knight of the Cartridge. Wears a round table emblem. Has romantic fixation on member of royalty

4 - Master Nameless. A black bandana. Assassin-hunter

5 - Newer Elements of Our Defense. Face of a human soldier. Tomb guard

6 - Unknown Joshua. Childlike naivete. Plays tic-tac-toe with anyone willing

7 - Three Interlocked Pigeons. Quotes engraved excerpts of Hidden Leaves. Ronin knight

8 - Turagapadabandha. A chess knight atop its turban. Might actually be a hoax.

I HEAR THE VOICE OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC
1 - Two grinding metal disks produce one-word shrieks

2 - Resonates body and floor to speak in resounding echoes

3 - Alters shape of holes in latticed head to create a fluting voice

4 - Silent. Etch-a-Sketch face shows pictographs

5 - Only expressive whistles and pops

6 - Tinny voicebox in head. Precedes with description: “Query” “Command” etc

7 - A calm seemingly male monotone from its one pulsing eye

8 - Totally normal human voice. Ridiculously complicated workings for proper imitation

I LEARN THE MISSION OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC

1 - to enact revenge on a conquering nation

2 - to guard its sleeping masters

3 - to bear an urgent message to a foreign monarchy

4 - to map the poisoned wastes of the beastmen

5 - to recover a holy relic for its clergy

6 - to preach holy writ to the dominant heathens

7 - to activate a great weapon on behalf of a guerrilla group

8 - to ensure the prosperity of its creator’s descendants

BUT

1 - they are in hiding, a persecuted minority

2 - by all accounts they never existed

3 - that was on the other side of the world

4 - it has forgotten who they were

5 - they are rather well off now and wish to hide what it knows

6 - it appears similar to a legendary demon of theirs

7 - they have been gone for an age, but its reactivation heralds their return

8 - they were horribly cursed or mutated by an event that it caused

I PLUNDER THE WRECKAGE OF THE KNIGHT AUTOMATONIC

1 - Wind-up alarm clock

2 - Fist-sized perpetual motion machine

3 - Sample of reverse-engineerable alchemist’s fire

4 - Wiring and generator, like a janky taser

5 - Sliding puzzle key to the Pyramid Calculative

6 - Polished slate prophecy of the prehistoric serpentmen

7 - Salvageable mainspring and winding mechanism

8 - Chaos Butterfly fossil

See also: Asimov, HAL, Prehistory, Time Travel, Robots, Rip Van Winkel, Arthuriana, Chivalry, Programming, Droid concept art

BONUS: I GET TWO KNIGHTS AUTOMATONIC TO DUEL

1000 verbs to gaze upon, slack-jawed

OUT OF A LIVING DICTIONARY I CUT THEM. SO MANY POSSIBLE ACTIONS

Abjure

Ablate

Abolish

Absorb

Abuse

Accelerate

Accumulate

Acquire

Act

Activate

Add

Admire

Adorn

Advise

Afflict

Aggravate

Aggregate

Agonize

Aid

Allow

Analyze

Animate

Annul

Anoint

Apprentice

Ask

Assassinate

Assert

Assess

Assist

Attack

Avoid

Revenant Hexes

EDIT: everyone's favorite Oscar-winning miserycrawl is now automated

Landscape

01-06 Snowy pine woods

07-10 A mountain path blocked by snow

11-14 A steep, winding mountain path

15-19 Woods flooded ankle deep

20-24 Swathe of tree stumps

25-32 Green woods

33-36 Leaf-filled ravine in green woods

37-44 Frozen flood plain, deep snow

45-48 Bare mountainside, silent

49-52 Leafless bushes on edge of plain

53-56 Cliffs; rapids far below

57-60 Wide river, rapids

61-64 Wide river, shallow ford, floating ice

65-68 Narrow but rapid river

69-72 Creek with steep clay banks

73-75 Dead bodies among empty hovels

76-78 Charred ruins of village

79-80 Burned village, still smoking

81-81 Burning boat

82-83 Run-down cabin

84-84 Roofless ruined church, trees growing inside

85-86 Sparse copse, a lean-to, still steaming

87-91 Winding game trail through boulders

92-94 Solitary tree on a hilltop

95-96 Pyramid of stacked animal skulls

97-98 Crude weir in shallows of river

99-00 Remains of a fire in lee of boulder

Weather

01-14 Wispy pastel clouds, clear

15-29 Dense clouds, light snow

30-44 Distant thunder, thin clouds

45-54 Driving sleet

55-64 Silent fluffy snow, blankets

65-74 Clear skies, sun or stars, extra cold

75-84 Extreme wind

85-94 Warm sun, meltwater

95-00 Light rain, mild temperature

Encounters

01-19 Ambient noises

20-39 Eerie silence

40-44 d3 moose

45-46 Dead horse and rider filled with arrows

47-49 Single dog, barking

50-53 Herd of buffalo grazing

54-55 Herd of buffalo stampeding

56-58 Herd of buffalo with additional encounter

59-59 Herd of dead, skinned buffalo

60-61 2d10 tame pigs running free, owner’s corpse nearby

62-63 Solitary bear

64-65 Bear with d4 cubs

66-70 d12 wolves

71-72 Hunting party (2d12) watching silently

73-74 Two riders: one alive, one dead

75-76 A bitter ex-soldier looking for the good life

77-78 A mutilated explorer, left for dead

79-80 Lone survivor looking for kin

81-82 Old woman, her food taken

83-84 Starving man scrounging for marrow from bones

85-88 Hanged body with arbitrary warning on neck

87-90 2d12 trappers driven far off course

91-94 2d12 trappers hiding slaves

95-97 2d20 horseback archers watching silently

98-00 2d20 horseback archers attacking (roll again)

dfd hack

Disclaimer: I have never played or run Death Frost Doom. I have never even read it.

But it seems like a pretty good way to start a campaign so here is

Ian’s
BLIND D.F.D. HACK CAMPAIGN KICKER GENERATOR

A.K.A outline for a dungeon where a catastrophic force is held at bay until the PCs release it accidentally.

FORCE. Broad types of things that could be released by the party exploring this dungeon:

1 - Huge Army or Horde (skeletons, space troopers, terracotta soldiers)

2 - Solitary Hunter or Predator (alien, dracula, Bengal tiger)

3 - Spreading Plague or Infestation (mutagens, rage virus, undead curse)

4 - Massive Beast or Monster (Tarrasque, dragon, Mononoke nightwalker)

5 - Mindless Eater or Devourer (The Blob, black hole)

6 - Disaster or Cataclysm (San Andreas, superstorm, wildfire)

(Last Gasp’d with a bunch of adjectives here)

EXAMPLES BECAUSE YOU’RE IN A HURRY

1. Skeleton Army
2. Volcanic giant
3. Ubermensch from the past (Khan...or evil Captain America)
4. Rage virus
5. Self-replicating nanobots
6. Sphere of Annihilation
7. Shai-Hulud
8. Army of Decepticons
9. Dinosaurs
10. Smaug
11. A Nuke
12. Mutant spider horde led by 666 driders
13. Count Orlok
14. Lunar Leprosy
15. A humming, floating golden sphere with the Midas touch
16. Minotaur with adamantium endoskeleton
17. Anti-Oberon
18. Cyclopean mechas
19. The Pacific Rim portal
20. Psychic child experiment No. 28

CONTAINMENT. The force is:

1. Behind locked door, nearby guardian has key
2. Simply forgotten, anyone finding it can open
3. Kept in stasis/slumber by a spell effect
4. Not existent yet; opening “containment” creates force
5. In a battle with an equal, opposite force
6. Behind a guarded seal
7. Buried deep
8. Contained in dangerous terrain, like an island in lava
9. Lost in a confusing place
10. Not contained, but a ward keeps it benign

Some of these don't make sense so use your brain (how can an earthquake get lost?). You gotta figure out a way the PCs can trip the containment that would not necessarily be a horrible idea for them. Put treasure behind it, or the damn exit to whatever hellhole they’re stuck in.

HOW THEY BEHAVE ONCE THEY’RE OUT

1 - Army or Horde will cut a swathe of destruction towards whatever target they seek - usually for revenge or power. Settlements and resources in between are taken over, used or destroyed, unless the army has particular reasons to ignore them.

2 - Solitary Hunter or Predator will remain hidden around groups, usually travelling to a place where they can hunt without interference. Intelligent hunters may have more lofty goals and machinations.

3 - Plague or Infestation spreads in all directions amongst food sources, more quickly among population centers, slower in sparse areas

4 - Massive Beast behaves similar to an army, but mostly just destroys everything in its path. Often driven by hunger or hatred of cities.

5 - Mindless Devourer follows food, growing and spreading arbitrarily depending on what it eats.

6 - The Disaster or Cataclysm quickly fills and ruins the local area and generally doesn’t spread, though “local” can mean dozens of hexes, or an entire ocean.

Ideally this means within the first couple sessions the world is changing significantly for the worse because of something the PCs did